- 1 Approach guys that interest you. Approach a lot of guys. To get started in the pick-up game, you have to get out there and meet guys. As hard as it may seem (right now), you need to go where gay men are and approach them. Once you do it a few times, you'll start to get the hang of it, and find out what works for you—and what doesn't!
2
Be friendly. Lose any arrogant attitude or elitism, and keep this in mind: no matter how pretty or handsome you think you are, most guys looking for a good time don't include the attribute "jerk" in their wish list.
Be friendly. Lose any arrogant attitude or elitism, and keep this in mind: no matter how pretty or handsome you think you are, most guys looking for a good time don't include the attribute "jerk" in their wish list.
- 3Don't hesitate. Confidence kills it every time!! Hesitation conveys indecision and nervousness—traits that will not get you very far. Practice the three-second rule: approach your target within three seconds of seeing him, or pick another target.
- Start talking! If you can’t strike up a conversation, you don't have a chance to pick up and eventually seduce someone you’re attracted to—but it's not that hard to do. A simple "hello" is a great place to start.
4
Learn some approaches. Approaches are an excuse—any excuse—to start a conversation with someone: "How do I get to the Hyatt Regency from here?"; "There’s some lint on your collar"; "I noticed something about you..." Of course, the easiest of all approaches is simply to smile, look in their eyes, and say "Hi."
Learn some approaches. Approaches are an excuse—any excuse—to start a conversation with someone: "How do I get to the Hyatt Regency from here?"; "There’s some lint on your collar"; "I noticed something about you..." Of course, the easiest of all approaches is simply to smile, look in their eyes, and say "Hi."
- Forget pick up lines: "I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand."; "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" Those are corny, trite, transparent, convey too much sexual interest, and leave you with no place to go but home alone.
- 5Have an opener. You’ve exchanged a few words. What happens next is crucial. You’ve got to navigate from being a complete stranger that your new friend is simply humoring to being someone he actually wants to give his attentions to.
- Standard conversational ploys will draw your friend in. Try something startling: "That wasn't your car on fire in the parking lot, was it?"; "Did you see those two guys fighting outside?"
- Offer an opinion: "Hey, can I ask you a question? What's the best way to forget an ex? This guy I know..."
- Develop your opener into a little routine by adding vivid details ("One fireman was so hunky that..."). Get your new friend involved and keep him engaged.
- Sometimes it helps to give the opener a time constraint so that he thinks you’ll shortly be on your way ("I’ve got to go find my friend, but...")
Part 2 of 2: Continuing The Conversation
- 1Learn to be "disinterested." Unless he's got "derp" written all over him, by now he will suspect you're trying to pick him up. This is good—you don't want him to not think of you that way. Still, keep him just a bit off balance to give time for his attraction to develop. That means to keep talking in a friendly way while pretending you’re not really that interested sexually.
- 2Demonstrate your social value to allow him to be attracted. Don’t stop talking, but don’t just talk aimlessly. Be funny and entertaining and cast yourself in a positive light in the stories you tell. Tell him about the time you went camping and scared away the bear, or how great your new gym routine is making you feel.
- Talk about ex-boyfriends or hang a friend around your shoulder to demonstrate that others think you’re attractive.
- Give him enough ammunition to allow himself to be attracted to you. When he is, you’ll see the signals in his eyes and body language that indicates his increasing interest.
- 3Give him a dose of Vitamin T: Touch! Touch early and often to get things going; but make sure your touches are motivated, not crude pawing.
- Flick off his "lint" that you discovered earlier. Examine his cool wristwatch. Flatten his messed up collar. Slap away his too familiar fingers. Crack his neck. Test his kiss-ability quotient.
- To leave him wanting more, let your touches be fleeting. No clamping your hand on his bottom and leaving it there. Unless he does it first.
- 4Isolate, move, and keep developing rapport. Invite him to a quieter corner of the bar, and maybe then outside for a breath of air or to a pizza place you know where you can grab a slice of pizza. If you're feeling lucky...invite him to your place to check on a pet!
